Doppelganging

Guys, let's talk about ME for once, OK??


For a long time people told me I looked like Jodi Foster. But I used to have a different nose back then. We can talk about that some other time, but I can see what they're saying.  Eye shape, mouth shape, eyebrow shape. General lesbian vibe. It's cool, I understand.

Then, I got Teri Polo. Yep, I see this one too, and I accept this one with open arms. My face is all cheekboney, and so are these two ladies. Teri's a little scrawny for my preference, but that's why I eat foods.

(And this one's actually kind of perfect, because people say my dad looks like Robert DeNiro. If you need more proof, I'll send you some:

)

But my favorite doppelganger?

Yes, you saw that correctly. USHER. As a white female, I don't know how I should react to this comparison. Do you see it? This absolutely insane black woman I worked with in Memphis said I looked like him, and it was something about my "smirk". Smirk? ME? She can just shut her mouth when she's talking to me! (She also didn't know his name is USHER...she genuinely thought it was Errsherr.)

So there you have it. Me and the celebrities who are trying to steal my identity.

Whoa. Don't mess with Bobby D..