Lately I've been watching a lot of gory television. Like, a LOT. Hours and hours of Forensic Files or Disappeared at home, hours of podcasts like Serial and Sword and Scale at work. The books I read are often murder mysteries.
Last week my choice was two seasons of The Fall. It was gripping. The premise, as usual, was a serial killer ravaging a community and the police working to stop him. At one point the question is raised, from one of the characters, directly into the camera- "why are you watching this?"
I knew the question was for me, not for the characters in the show. Why WAS I watching it? It was depraved and violent, but I was hooked. And for that matter, I'm always hooked. Give me a true crime murder series and I can hardly tear myself away. Friends and family always want to know how can I sleep, how can I watch "that stuff"?
The answer is the mystery part. Not the murder part. It's exciting to see how the crime is solved, to see the clues and the way it gets pieced together. Especially in true crime, it's amazing to see how such tiny, insignificant details can put the puzzle pieces together, and that it is real! Not imagined, not conveniently scripted, but those clues have true significance in the conclusion.
There's also a part of me that is storing away all of the details. Sometimes I think the shows are such a perfect map for criminals to commit their crimes, but for me, it's a perfect map for my safety. It's important to me to be prepared, to be aware and to know what to do should I ever find myself in a dangerous situation. Pessimistic? Maybe. In college our director of safety reminded us relentlessly that most crimes are crimes of opportunity, and remember that lovely slogan, knowledge is power? Maybe by being aware and alert, there is less opportunity to be at risk.
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